Let your words be few

Some people are like a chatterbox; they talk and talk, yet they do not stop to listen. There are too many people who will not listen to what you have to say, they prefer that you listen to them. It seems like they believe somehow that their views are more important than the views of other people. Such people tend to get very impatient when someone else is talking and barely listen to what that person is saying, they just stand by impatiently and even interrupt the other person so that they can start talking again. People who talk too much seem not to have learned the wisdom in saying less and listening more. When a person is always talking, they do not have time to learn from others and because of that, they most likely will remain stagnant in life and will not grow beyond a certain point. They may erroneously think that because they say too much then they must know better than others, but they forget other people have wisdom to share and most of the time there is always something one can learn from other people. People who talk too much seem to be blinded by their desires to be liked or validated or accepted or to be seen as better than others. Such are usually the most loud and always seem to have an opinion about almost everything. “Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruit” Proverbs 18:21.

People who talk too much expose too much, whether about their own lives or the lives of other people. It seems like they think that the more they share, the more people will like them. They fail to realize that the same words they speak can later be used against them by some people. Such people cannot be trusted because they easily gossip. The moment you tell them something, they will go and share what you tell them with everyone who will listen to them. In the course of their non-stop talking, they end up sinning against God and against those people who had told them something in confidence. Many people who talk too much are people who cannot keep confidence, they will go spreading something personal that you tell them. If you seek for advice or help from them, some go saying about how you approached them for help. “He who goes about as a talebearer reveals secrets; therefore do not associate with one who flatters with his lips” Proverbs 20:19.

If a person talks too much, they easily expose their foolishness.  They end up saying things that should not be said or talking in a way that is not fitting for the situation they may be in. In their effort to try and impress people, they end up revealing who they really are. Initially they may seem to know it all but when you listen to them carefully you are able the hear where their heart really is. “He who has knowledge spares his words, and a man of understanding is of a calm spirit. Even a fool is counted wise when he holds his peace; when he shuts his lips, he is considered perceptive” Proverbs 17:27-28. Such people also do not seem to receive correction easily, they are usually haughty and if you correct them they might end up attacking you with demeaning words. They may start telling you all the weaknesses they think you have, they will tell you that you do not mean anything or that your words do not mean anything to them, they will attack your personality, your physical attributes, and degrade you in every way possible. This happens because when you correct them, you bruise their ego, and in an effort to self-preserve, they will attack you in an attempt to bring you down and discredit you. Such people like to be heard but do not give other people time to express themselves. “The wise in heart will receive commands, but a prating fool will fall” Proverbs 10:8.

If you talk too much, it is easy to be deceived. When a person approaches you and you give too many details about yourself, then they can easily use that information that you have given them against you. If you meet a stranger, wisdom says you listen more than you speak, because in listening you are able to discern who that person really is. However, if you meet someone and become over-excited and start telling them everything about you, you will realize that in the end that person will know a lot about you but when you think back about how much you know about them, you will realize that you know very little. When you talk too much, you do yourself a disservice because you block yourself from getting to know the other person, this is because that other person does not get to say much. Be very careful and do not trust yourself into the hands of a stranger who you barely know; just because that person looks good or seems to be wealthy or seems to have it all together does not mean that they can be trusted. Take your time, get to observe the fruits of their lives because that is the true indication of who they really are. “He who guards his mouth preserves his life, but he who opens wide his lips shall have destruction” Proverbs 13:3.

Many people who say too much are also people who make hasty decisions. They quickly think of something, tell it to people, and decide they will do that thing without thinking much about it. This can be in an effort to please people or to be likable. They also tend to make promises that they do not fulfill. They may pledge to give something, or make a promise to another person, even before God, yet after following them up for sometime, you realize the promises they made were empty. They can also borrow something and promise to return at a later date, but when that date of returning arrives, they start making many excuses, and in most cases, the person who had loaned them has to count their loses. They may also seem like they are humble people but usually what they portray is false humility. “Do not be rash with your mouth, and let not your heart utter anything hastily before God. For God is in heaven, and you on earth; therefore let your words be few. For a dream comes through much activity, and a fool’s voice is known by his many words. When you make a vow to God, do not delay to pay it; for He has no pleasure in fools. Pay what you have vowed – better not to vow than to vow and not pay” Ecclesiastes 5:2-5.

Be careful about what you tell people, most people around you who appear as friends are probably not true friends and if they get hold of any information that can bring you down, they will easily jump to that opportunity and try to bring you down. Not everything needs to be said and there are some things you should not disclose except to a very trusted confidant. Above all, learn to take your burdens to God first and with time you will realize that after that you do not need to share with anyone else. God is trustworthy and He is our ever present help in times of need. In addition, when you make any promise to God or in the name of God, be quick to fulfill that promise. Do not make vows that you cannot fulfill, it is better not to make any vow at all than to make one and not fulfill. Fear God and do not utter any careless words. The words you speak will be used either to justify you or to condemn you on the day of judgement.

“But I say to you that for every idle word men may speak, they will give account of it in the day of judgement. For by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned” Matthew 12:36-37.

Blessings.

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